Chief
04-30-2008, 05:53 AM
http://conservativeintelligencer.com/christian-street-erupts-at-verhoeven-jesus-film/207/
By J. Wesley
April 25, 2008
A fifth day of rioting and bombings rocked North America and Europe as the Christian community reacted to news of a controversial biography of Jesus Christ. While public officials have appealed for calm, Christian rage seemed only to escalate yesterday as Pope Benedict issued a papal bull calling for the beheading of the book’s author, Paul Verhoeven. Samaritan’s Purse, a Christian “charity”, has announced a $3.2 million reward for anyone fulfilling the papal bull.
“The threat of Christian-American terror comes from only a tiny fringe of this otherwise great religion. Not more than fifty or sixty million Christian-Americans subscribe to these militant beliefs. As I have always said, Christianity is a religion of peace.”
-President George Bush
The Bush administration denounced the Verhoeven death sentence in a press conference yesterday, drawing criticism from the Barack Obama campaign. The Democratic presidential candidate told reporters, “If elected, I promise to meet with Pope Benedict without conditions. I am confident that Christians and Americans can work out a modus vivendi preserving at least fifty percent of our free speech rights.”
In Europe, the BBC reports that gangs of “Euro youths” burned hundreds of cars, assaulted police with fowling guns, and declared their neighborhoods “No-Go Zones” for non-Christians. In the United States, many suburban neighborhoods and southern towns similarly have been declared off-limits to “infidels.” Clashes with police claimed eighty-three lives yesterday while another sixty people died in the suicide bombing of a Topeka, Kansas movie theater. Members of the Buchanan Brigade claimed responsibility for the blast. In a hand-written communique, faction leader Patrick Buchanan stated, “Now THIS is a culture war.”
The violence is the worst since the 1999 Holy Virgin Mary with Elephant Dung incident which claimed 172 lives in Iowa alone. More deaths are feared as a tense stand-off continues in Chicago, where seeker-senstive militants from Willow Creek Community Church have taken hostages, demanding the execution of Paul Verhoeven. Justice officials are reluctant to storm the historic shrine as it is considered holy by many American Christians.
In New York City, Mayor Michael Bloomberg declared a state of emergency this morning as factional fighting between Christian militants paralyzed the city. Elements of the Legion of Mary, Campus Crusade for Christ and the Salvation Army clashed in Manhattan and Queens, while members of the First International Holy Crusade Church of the Power of God in Christ, Inc declared Harlem an autonomous Christian state.
Christian marketing groups responded to the controversy with a line of Precious Moments figurines featuring Verhoeven alternately immolated, beheaded or stoned to death. Artist Thomas Kinkade has completed a print of Verhoeven being beaten to death at sunset in a New England fishing village. Big Idea Productions has also announced the latest in its popular Veggie Tales line of children’s films — Larry and the Big Bang.
Moderate Christian groups are denouncing both the book and its resulting violence. The moderator of the Presbyterian Church issued a strongly worded statement yesterday: “We deeply regret that the blasphemous actions of Paul Verhoeven led to so many deaths and dismemberments. Please disregard the body count and remember that Christianity is a religion of peace.”
The FBI has begun a round-up of suspected Christian militants, but their efforts are hampered by legal injunctions filed by the moderate Christian Legal Society (CLS). In a press release, the CLS stated, “As Christians and Americans, we oppose both the violence and any government actions which might stop the violence.” Christian Coalition spokeswoman Michele Combs reports an upswing in anti-Christian hate crimes since the wave of bombings began: “Just yesterday, in Boise, a Christian passenger was assaulted by a taxidriver yelling ‘Jesus Christ!’ at a lengthy red light.”
Paul Verhoeven’s location is currently undisclosed and the fate of his book remains uncertain. A coalition of 2,583 intellectuals and members of the Screen Actors Guild have denounced the book for its “religious intolerance and insensitivity to the right of Christians not to be offended by anything at any time ever for any reason.”
Book distributors are refusing to carry the work due to the threat of bombings. Verhoeven earlier planned to distribute the book online, but internet hosting companies are likewise fearful and only the popular Daily Kos website has agreed to carry it. In addition to the threat of beheading, Verhoeven has found himself in legal jeopardy as the International Court of Human Rights in Brussels and the Canadian Human Rights Commission are both filing charges against him for crimes against humanity.
President Bush appealed for calm today in his weekly radio address, reminding Americans that they are all fellow-citizens. “The threat of Christian-American terror comes from only a tiny fringe of this otherwise great religion. Not more than fifty or sixty million Christian-Americans subscribe to these militant beliefs. As I have always said, Christianity is a religion of peace.”
It is said that the very sharpest of satire is best because it contains a hint of truth...
;)
By J. Wesley
April 25, 2008
A fifth day of rioting and bombings rocked North America and Europe as the Christian community reacted to news of a controversial biography of Jesus Christ. While public officials have appealed for calm, Christian rage seemed only to escalate yesterday as Pope Benedict issued a papal bull calling for the beheading of the book’s author, Paul Verhoeven. Samaritan’s Purse, a Christian “charity”, has announced a $3.2 million reward for anyone fulfilling the papal bull.
“The threat of Christian-American terror comes from only a tiny fringe of this otherwise great religion. Not more than fifty or sixty million Christian-Americans subscribe to these militant beliefs. As I have always said, Christianity is a religion of peace.”
-President George Bush
The Bush administration denounced the Verhoeven death sentence in a press conference yesterday, drawing criticism from the Barack Obama campaign. The Democratic presidential candidate told reporters, “If elected, I promise to meet with Pope Benedict without conditions. I am confident that Christians and Americans can work out a modus vivendi preserving at least fifty percent of our free speech rights.”
In Europe, the BBC reports that gangs of “Euro youths” burned hundreds of cars, assaulted police with fowling guns, and declared their neighborhoods “No-Go Zones” for non-Christians. In the United States, many suburban neighborhoods and southern towns similarly have been declared off-limits to “infidels.” Clashes with police claimed eighty-three lives yesterday while another sixty people died in the suicide bombing of a Topeka, Kansas movie theater. Members of the Buchanan Brigade claimed responsibility for the blast. In a hand-written communique, faction leader Patrick Buchanan stated, “Now THIS is a culture war.”
The violence is the worst since the 1999 Holy Virgin Mary with Elephant Dung incident which claimed 172 lives in Iowa alone. More deaths are feared as a tense stand-off continues in Chicago, where seeker-senstive militants from Willow Creek Community Church have taken hostages, demanding the execution of Paul Verhoeven. Justice officials are reluctant to storm the historic shrine as it is considered holy by many American Christians.
In New York City, Mayor Michael Bloomberg declared a state of emergency this morning as factional fighting between Christian militants paralyzed the city. Elements of the Legion of Mary, Campus Crusade for Christ and the Salvation Army clashed in Manhattan and Queens, while members of the First International Holy Crusade Church of the Power of God in Christ, Inc declared Harlem an autonomous Christian state.
Christian marketing groups responded to the controversy with a line of Precious Moments figurines featuring Verhoeven alternately immolated, beheaded or stoned to death. Artist Thomas Kinkade has completed a print of Verhoeven being beaten to death at sunset in a New England fishing village. Big Idea Productions has also announced the latest in its popular Veggie Tales line of children’s films — Larry and the Big Bang.
Moderate Christian groups are denouncing both the book and its resulting violence. The moderator of the Presbyterian Church issued a strongly worded statement yesterday: “We deeply regret that the blasphemous actions of Paul Verhoeven led to so many deaths and dismemberments. Please disregard the body count and remember that Christianity is a religion of peace.”
The FBI has begun a round-up of suspected Christian militants, but their efforts are hampered by legal injunctions filed by the moderate Christian Legal Society (CLS). In a press release, the CLS stated, “As Christians and Americans, we oppose both the violence and any government actions which might stop the violence.” Christian Coalition spokeswoman Michele Combs reports an upswing in anti-Christian hate crimes since the wave of bombings began: “Just yesterday, in Boise, a Christian passenger was assaulted by a taxidriver yelling ‘Jesus Christ!’ at a lengthy red light.”
Paul Verhoeven’s location is currently undisclosed and the fate of his book remains uncertain. A coalition of 2,583 intellectuals and members of the Screen Actors Guild have denounced the book for its “religious intolerance and insensitivity to the right of Christians not to be offended by anything at any time ever for any reason.”
Book distributors are refusing to carry the work due to the threat of bombings. Verhoeven earlier planned to distribute the book online, but internet hosting companies are likewise fearful and only the popular Daily Kos website has agreed to carry it. In addition to the threat of beheading, Verhoeven has found himself in legal jeopardy as the International Court of Human Rights in Brussels and the Canadian Human Rights Commission are both filing charges against him for crimes against humanity.
President Bush appealed for calm today in his weekly radio address, reminding Americans that they are all fellow-citizens. “The threat of Christian-American terror comes from only a tiny fringe of this otherwise great religion. Not more than fifty or sixty million Christian-Americans subscribe to these militant beliefs. As I have always said, Christianity is a religion of peace.”
It is said that the very sharpest of satire is best because it contains a hint of truth...
;)